Catching up

I haven't written in the last couple of weeks maybe even months but it felt like it wast time to write something about what's been happening lately. It's not like I write periodically but it is always good to take out what you might be feeling inside. Some people say I do it better in writing  X) Well I shall start I guess....My point of view about different stuff have changed. I have been trying to get to know myself in levels I haven't before. I think it was about time I started to deal with my past ...no not just guys - God when a girl says her past people truly just think about that but heyyyyy there is more than that we do have problems that not always involve a man or past relationships :) - anyways it was time to confront some"scars" and finally be able to say I move on or at least try to.Sometimes we still carry that burden whether we realize it or not. When you don't deal with your past and what hurts you, you will keep repeating cycles making the same mistakes.The fears will never disappear but just adjust to new-different situations you can go through whether is with friends, relatives or relationships. When you reach the point of "no return" , you will be able to see that you need to stop hurting yourself by thinking about what already happened. It might, it might not but if you don't take a chance you will never know what could have happened. Not all people are the same. Sometimes it is good to give the benefit of the doubt and let them prove who they truly are and want-feel.
Being able to know how you truly feel and admit those feelings is not always easy [at least not to everyone]. As I previously posted, I used to think that getting attached to someone or letting people know how you truly feel was a sign of vulnerability and of course I would try to protect myself by shutting down deep emotions. But man I was wrong, yeah Steff was wrong!!! Showing how you feel about someone or some situation is normal and there is nothing wrong with that. I am a human being - for those who ignore it lol - and of course there will be things that make happy,sad, upset me or irritates me. It is good to let people know what's on your mind or-and heart because otherwise they won't know it. Therefore, do not expect them to do things your way. Besides, it is always good to remind people - those who are important an special to you- that they are important and you appreciate everything they could have done for you. One little thing-detail for you[being yourself], could mean the "world" to someone else.I have realized that most of the time we take for granted how we can impact people's lives. How everything we have done or said to someone has actually made them feel. It feels so good when someone tells you that time you smiled at them, gave them a hug or just talked for a little bit made them feel appreciated and important.
In addition, I am happy my life is quite stable. I mean there is always going to be ups and downs but that's the point isn't it? When things are not so bright is when you know who is actually there for you and cares for you. You don't need that person to fix everything for you but by just knowing they will be there to give you their support and love means the world. I am happy of the people who are part of my life - my family, friends and boyfriend- I know I can count on them if I need someone to talk to or anything. Glad I have a good bf who is not only that but a good friend who I know I can turn to if I need help- advice. I am lucky to have them and they know they will always count on me for anything.
 I know there are haters - jealous people- about not only how loved I am but also the "success" I can have in my career at least so far :). Some of them are part of my life indirectly- "friends", some are just "strangers". When things like this happen, you have two options. 1. Make them a "motivation" to be even better or 2. Get mad and ruin your own happiness- making them win. Obviously I have been choosing the first one. There is no better pleasure than see all your haters mad that they cannot destroy you and it also helps you to know how strong and far you can get in life.
Maybe the way I am or see things is not the best one. Hey I am deff. not perfect and I don't want to be.  I am who I am and if there is something I need to work on, I will. I am not afraid of challenges. As long as I have the people I love by my side, make them proud and Happy...That's deff. all I want and look for.
This is just the beginning of new chapters and adjust previous one...We shall see how things go... #Hopes up :)