The pain never goes away

People say that when you lose someone you love, time will help you move on. That’s a lie. Time won’t lessen the pain; you will only learn how to live with it. It’s been 8 years since I lost my grandfather and the pain is the same. I still remember everything that happened, how I found out the news about his passing and the moment I saw his body lacking life. It’s like a movie well like a horror movie that keeps playing in my mind. Even thought not having him hurts like no one will ever know, I understand why he had to leave me. I know it was time to end his suffering and he is in a better place right now. There is no day that he won’t cross my mind. I have lost count of how many times I have wanted him to be by my side and give me a hug. So many times I have prayed and wished to see him just one more time to just spend a couple of minutes with him but I know no matter what I do it won’t happen at least not yet. Maybe when I die, he will be the one waiting for me on the other side or at least I want to believe that. The only thing that comforts me a little bit, is knowing that I got to spend as much time as I did during his last months alive.  I got to take care of him when he was at home and hospital. I don’t know if he ever knew how much he means to me and how much I love him but I hope wherever he is he know it now… As time pass by, I just hope I make him and every person I love proud. No matter how many years go by I will always remember everything we did together and his love for his family. I will always love you viejito and I will never ever forget you.

Love,

Your number one…